“Healer” A Prose Poetry by Nicola An

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“Healer”

Just when I thought I’ve forgotten the scars I took in my flesh and my shadow from yesteryears, a clean start looks like it is about ready to be tainted. I’m afraid I’ve been so used to getting hurt, I’ve acquired an incurable addiction to heartache

The qualms that deter for it’s clearly presumed that remembrance is time’s gift whether we like it or not, gone does not mean forgotten

As my heart sings again, an echo of its previous songs remains in the background but should this be about what I try to hear again or what I audibly hear at the moment?

The world says you can’t love again unless your heart has completely healed but isn’t loving again the only way to heal a pained love?What if it’s the right person you prayed for, you don’t need to appear all new and sound that maybe only in these moments of living loving you do I get the complete healing I deserve?

Now I understand why I still felt broken no matter how I greatly took care of myself. Like a true love’s kiss made to break a curse, maybe you’re the exact antidote to treat my heart, the healer that Love wanted me to wait for…[hopefully]

-art and words by Nicola An

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23rd Year

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Here’s to 2 3 years of borrowing this lifetime-this exhilarating and whimsical school of life. 2 3 years of being lost only to be found. 2 3 years of dreaming illusions before waking up to truth cannot be revoked. 2 3 years of giving and to be given more than what is expected. 2 3 years of being too much of myself and to finally let go and surrender to emptiness grandly liberating. 2 3 years of holding back and now allowing what is necessary to be there. 2 3 years of constantly feeling different yet always easily creating home. 2 3 and many years of loving unconditionally. My dear Universe, earth is beautiful, I am deeply honored, bless all the souls with me here. Happy 23rd birthday to this human I am grateful to take care of very well. My Soul loves me so much, I am infinite!
Only Love Only Light
-Nicola An

First Publishing Anniversary 

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Oh dear Universe and all the loving spirits in the higher dimensions, thank you for A YEAR of “The Universe at Heartbeat”, this is me speaking from my earth self, thank you for allowing me to create this piece. For the times of constant healing whenever I see this book because the journey that made me accomplish this will always be that one special reminder of being grateful to be here and being capable of understanding the balance and magic of existence. Thank you for making it as a bridge for me to connect to people I instantly find warm and welcoming even without meeting them, and for the kind words I randomly receive. I hope to create more and to send the love even to the next lifetime. I am not sure if I’ve spoken enough to deliver the true journey of this book, but hopefully to suffice it all: THE UNIVERSE AT HEARTBEAT is my gratitude to the Light that saved me, it is giving back to what I’ve been given, and from that Light I learned to always see the good and to never run out of something good to give. ­čÖé I wish you a lifetime full of blissful days and a peaceful heart!

Thank you for your existence, if you happen to read this, do something good to yourself now! -Infinitely,

Nicola An

Souls at Home

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They’re meant to be each other’s home for only when together they can  stand side by side with all that restores and spreads the light to watch over the world and make it as majestic and wondrous as it was before the hands of the Universe did the craft, before time was numbered, before space gave birth to distance. But Love being the quintessence of existence, untouchable and beyond the limits and appraisal of the human’s eyes, it extensively unfolds to bring two Souls no matter how apart their entities on earth are. Love and Light will certainly come to them for that is what they’re made of. Eventually, there will be returning to the Source. That is how they are each other’s home.

 -Infinitely,

Nicola An
Only Love Only Light

Letter of Apology to Divine Love

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Dear Love,

Please forgive this heart, forgive my current situation, the sudden panic and confusion.

Please forgive me for the bitter words I threw at your name, for what you were in the world at that moment.

Please forgive me for pushing Love away just because it kept pulling you closer to me.

Please forgive my impatience, for letting myself give in to my human weaknesses.

Please forgive me for ever saying that I hated you the most in this world just because I cannot run away from you even if I wanted to forget you ever happened to me.

Please forgive me that I’m still going to let myself down for a while, that I am not strong enough yet to keep fighting for this Love, for turning my back on this Light.

But know that I can’t breathe well, my heart is hurting in ways that I find fatal that I am getting sick, though I am completely sticking to this weakness, I know I will survive soon for your Divine Love will always hold me.

Oh sweet Soul, forgive this heart for being tired of this world.
I love you still

-Infinitely,

your Divine Love in the third dimension

A Whisper of Positivity 

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If you are weary, scared and shattered, I hope this can help:
Acknowledging that there is Oneness,it’s impossible not to empathize, it’s real frustrating, affecting a feeling of being so powerless. I’ve been trying to make every tragic news fall on my deaf ears but the more resilient you are, the more you get pushed and the last straw is when the “opposite of the light” is well aware of your weakness, it takes one incident to eventuate your fall. Sometimes the way to the light is quite wobbly, I won’t sugarcoat spirituality.It is a SILENT BATTLE UNSEEN. I know that some of you can comprehend, and some only read this with immediate confusion and even a flicker of unfavorable impression;nevertheless,I believe that we all dream of salvation, redemption, peace…of heaven even here on #earth because we all have hopes and goals,chased or ignored.It is our purpose to look forward to happier beginnings so we can go back to paradise we’ve been told we came from and only when we choose the good, do the good and SEE the good can we return HOME.If you want to consider the “bad”, yes! It’s the “opposite of the light” taunting and daunting you so you will surrender to its darkness but please, this is the best moment to look at things as the Higher Power’s test how adamant you are when it comes to fulfilling what drives you to reaching your higher self!Just because it’s not safe anywhere doesn’t mean you stay shut and immobile, get out, the world is for adventures.Just because they say the end is near doesn’t mean you end your quest for bliss, every single day is full of forever! Just because people punish and kill doesn’t mean no one can be trusted and no one deserves forgiveness, an act of strong compassion always makes a HEART beat. Just because atrocity is omnipresent and viral doesn’t mean TRUE LOVE is hard to be found, what isn’t easily attained is always worth the fight! 

Do not decorate your own deathbed by giving up living.Remember that everything is a test of #FAITH.

-Infinitely,Nicola An

FULL “Flower” MOON

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Wednesday #poetry, back for this month’s #FULLMOON: “Flower Moon”

Oh Watcher of our Souls

fumbling for the Light,

May your bloom rescue

this blighted and sore heart

hiding in the night

Teach me more and better

ways to trust and decipher

the complexities and

travesties in the Universe

Help my Faith in these wished

things to Grow even without

my eyes to witness and my

hands to control

Guide my thoughts,my emotions

and my Spirit in the chasm

breathing with the shadows

underneath the earth

as I wait for my season to

completely flourish,

to wake up to the sight of

the Meadow I’ve been dreaming

and painting on the stars
Infinitely,

Nicola An art & poetry