Just when I thought I’ve forgotten the scars I took in my flesh and my shadow from yesteryears, a clean start looks like it is about ready to be tainted. I’m afraid I’ve been so used to getting hurt, I’ve acquired an incurable addiction to heartache
The qualms that deter for it’s clearly presumed that remembrance is time’s gift whether we like it or not, gone does not mean forgotten
As my heart sings again, an echo of its previous songs remains in the background but should this be about what I try to hear again or what I audibly hear at the moment?
The world says you can’t love again unless your heart has completely healed but isn’t loving again the only way to heal a pained love?What if it’s the right person you prayed for, you don’t need to appear all new and sound that maybe only in these moments of living loving you do I get the complete healing I deserve?
Now I understand why I still felt broken no matter how I greatly took care of myself. Like a true love’s kiss made to break a curse, maybe you’re the exact antidote to treat my heart, the healer that Love wanted me to wait for…[hopefully]
-art and words by Nicola An
I always love taught by the ocean
However,I question the longevity
For this isn’t as deep as the
current that helped me propel when
life at its worst fell
As my heart then learns what
choice to keep
” to sink or to float?”
He may be as fancy as a brand
new glistening boat
Such sight in thought reminds me
of the BALMY breeze and WARMTH
I’ve been feeding my own depth
selfishly to drown for another
This, a point of resolve to stay
on the surface, my body in
Floating and fairly breathing
Because now I’d rather look
at LOVE in the most precious
grinning SUN up above –
art & poem by Nicola An
Getting on with life through moments and chances, seeing and feeling what is necessary and what is provided, gladly taking in everything that is already there and yet glimpsing at an occasional episode of a disquieting thought like a shrill of warning piercing you inside. By and by, some things make an abrupt landing on your shoulders, one is when you surrender to the realization that what if what you have been greatly mastering leads you to failing, your comfort ccollapsing?
Such is the case for someone who has continuously earned the solitary days. Along the journey of finding bliss in solitude, getting so used to both inner and outer self while allowing the HEART to beat and the SOUL to search, I am bound to fear the confidence of aloneness, that this being all composed and distant where I stand still appreciating the gloom, I might miss what’s waiting for me behind the fog; which part of the world I must tend and nurture because as long as the skies whisper, there is somewhere that asks me to listen.
Life is always so clever teaching that what you highly gain turns out to instigate your pitfall. Maybe I have been too much at healing myself, I have forgotten that to love myself more is to manifest that love where it also belongs
– Nicola An
My second book entitled “Soul Song” will be available soon. Thank you for the gift of Divine Love
Here’s to 2 3 years of borrowing this lifetime-this exhilarating and whimsical school of life. 2 3 years of being lost only to be found. 2 3 years of dreaming illusions before waking up to truth cannot be revoked. 2 3 years of giving and to be given more than what is expected. 2 3 years of being too much of myself and to finally let go and surrender to emptiness grandly liberating. 2 3 years of holding back and now allowing what is necessary to be there. 2 3 years of constantly feeling different yet always easily creating home. 2 3 and many years of loving unconditionally. My dear Universe, earth is beautiful, I am deeply honored, bless all the souls with me here. Happy 23rd birthday to this human I am grateful to take care of very well. My Soul loves me so much, I am infinite!
Only Love Only Light
Oh dear Universe and all the loving spirits in the higher dimensions, thank you for A YEAR of “The Universe at Heartbeat”, this is me speaking from my earth self, thank you for allowing me to create this piece. For the times of constant healing whenever I see this book because the journey that made me accomplish this will always be that one special reminder of being grateful to be here and being capable of understanding the balance and magic of existence. Thank you for making it as a bridge for me to connect to people I instantly find warm and welcoming even without meeting them, and for the kind words I randomly receive. I hope to create more and to send the love even to the next lifetime. I am not sure if I’ve spoken enough to deliver the true journey of this book, but hopefully to suffice it all: THE UNIVERSE AT HEARTBEAT is my gratitude to the Light that saved me, it is giving back to what I’ve been given, and from that Light I learned to always see the good and to never run out of something good to give. 🙂 I wish you a lifetime full of blissful days and a peaceful heart!
Thank you for your existence, if you happen to read this, do something good to yourself now! -Infinitely,
Please forgive this heart, forgive my current situation, the sudden panic and confusion.
Please forgive me for the bitter words I threw at your name, for what you were in the world at that moment.
Please forgive me for pushing Love away just because it kept pulling you closer to me.
Please forgive my impatience, for letting myself give in to my human weaknesses.
Please forgive me for ever saying that I hated you the most in this world just because I cannot run away from you even if I wanted to forget you ever happened to me.
Please forgive me that I’m still going to let myself down for a while, that I am not strong enough yet to keep fighting for this Love, for turning my back on this Light.
But know that I can’t breathe well, my heart is hurting in ways that I find fatal that I am getting sick, though I am completely sticking to this weakness, I know I will survive soon for your Divine Love will always hold me.
Oh sweet Soul, forgive this heart for being tired of this world.
I love you still
your Divine Love in the third dimension