Here’s to 2 3 years of borrowing this lifetime-this exhilarating and whimsical school of life. 2 3 years of being lost only to be found. 2 3 years of dreaming illusions before waking up to truth cannot be revoked. 2 3 years of giving and to be given more than what is expected. 2 3 years of being too much of myself and to finally let go and surrender to emptiness grandly liberating. 2 3 years of holding back and now allowing what is necessary to be there. 2 3 years of constantly feeling different yet always easily creating home. 2 3 and many years of loving unconditionally. My dear Universe, earth is beautiful, I am deeply honored, bless all the souls with me here. Happy 23rd birthday to this human I am grateful to take care of very well. My Soul loves me so much, I am infinite!
Only Love Only Light
If you are weary, scared and shattered, I hope this can help:
Acknowledging that there is Oneness,it’s impossible not to empathize, it’s real frustrating, affecting a feeling of being so powerless. I’ve been trying to make every tragic news fall on my deaf ears but the more resilient you are, the more you get pushed and the last straw is when the “opposite of the light” is well aware of your weakness, it takes one incident to eventuate your fall. Sometimes the way to the light is quite wobbly, I won’t sugarcoat spirituality.It is a SILENT BATTLE UNSEEN. I know that some of you can comprehend, and some only read this with immediate confusion and even a flicker of unfavorable impression;nevertheless,I believe that we all dream of salvation, redemption, peace…of heaven even here on #earth because we all have hopes and goals,chased or ignored.It is our purpose to look forward to happier beginnings so we can go back to paradise we’ve been told we came from and only when we choose the good, do the good and SEE the good can we return HOME.If you want to consider the “bad”, yes! It’s the “opposite of the light” taunting and daunting you so you will surrender to its darkness but please, this is the best moment to look at things as the Higher Power’s test how adamant you are when it comes to fulfilling what drives you to reaching your higher self!Just because it’s not safe anywhere doesn’t mean you stay shut and immobile, get out, the world is for adventures.Just because they say the end is near doesn’t mean you end your quest for bliss, every single day is full of forever! Just because people punish and kill doesn’t mean no one can be trusted and no one deserves forgiveness, an act of strong compassion always makes a HEART beat. Just because atrocity is omnipresent and viral doesn’t mean TRUE LOVE is hard to be found, what isn’t easily attained is always worth the fight!
Do not decorate your own deathbed by giving up living.Remember that everything is a test of #FAITH.
A #christmaswishlist : WORLD PEACE. Though you may say it’s a folly to wish for it and it’s a swollen righteousness of oneself to ask for it, I would still dare affirm that we can achieve it. Let’s not only talk about the ceasefire, the safety from mass killing and freedom from slavery, let’s look at our basic destructive ways of how we mostly live now which commence the torrent of violence and torture. We are oblivious, in denial as we subconsciously refuse to acknowledge our involvement in wars and ruins. The oneness of our existence despite the diversity aims to nurture the world;therefore, we connect in every aspect,every phase and every form. This is a wish for #worldpeace through the end of your resentments-our anger and collective defensiveness to generate #love and eliminate spite. Remember that you are an #energy, a contagious and influential force, be an #energy of peace! The #earth is a vulnerable thing, it yields to what you offer.
Merry Christmas, have faith in your #light 🌌 🌌 -Yours truly,Nicola An
How that one time when I thought the world wasn’t the kindest, turned out,it had given me something to accomplish and for the rest of my life I’ll thank the universe for that time and I knew it was a curse turned as gift.
My book now available for purchase:
The Universe at Heartbeat by Nicola An
One morning you just woke up to the face of your dream.
I honestly wanted to run this race a little longer thinking it still wasn’t the time yet but I realized maybe the running wasn’t to further but to escape. I know I have learned to fit the positive version of myself, I worked the best that I can on my life to gain it but there comes a time still when I become quite a pain on my own neck when I fail to fully grasp when there is something given to me to celebrate and later ache for having that constant feeling of being stuck at the bottom. Last night (Wednesday) was a gift of heaven to have an exclusive time just talking to my best(soul)friend sharing this news that I have received the copy, and I had to confess how hard it was to look for that spark in me to feel the right emotion, I was having blues I couldn’t understand, that’s when I was told that I’ve been indulging fears, said I always don’t give it all out reason why I don’t have it all in return. I had it once, when a great dream was standing right in front of me, it’s like I just gave a brief glimpse and walked away as if I didn’t struggle alone to reach it. Oh God as human, I am still in the process, and I am willing to restore confidence so HERE I AM, RAW AND BRAVE to give you the key and get inside my universe. The door is yours. I won’t miss another day of my life pretending it’s still okay not to bring you light and even if there might be a source of negativity around taking advantage of my vulnerability, I have to remind myself I am alive because I choose to follow my heart. Also, a dream is more worth the fight if it isn’t just the self in it but the Love you witness that you wish to speak to everybody’s heart to grant God’s incredible work of miracles and magic. I am not an aspiring praised writer here but just a mere child of the universe with infinite hopes to be an instrument of truth and love, and a soul wishing to FIND that RIGHT PLACE to send a message of gratitude.
It’s almost a year since I sat in one corner imagining to make this a reality : “The Universe at Heartbeat” by yours truly, Nicola An Poetry Book: “The Universe at Heartbeat” by Nicola An
PS:August is definitely my month. I admire my parents so much.
“a testimony made through poetry and prose that tells a young journey of an old soul conveying love as the utmost life of the universe; this book is ours”
Link to purchase: Shelf
Preview of the book: BOOK TRAILER
While I’m working on my final requirement to publish in paperback, I also make my first poetry book available in kindle . To those who wish to have a company in times of self-discovery, fighting for their dreams, having a hard time loving and even in times when they are the hopefully hopeless romantic type, I am one with you all. I bleed words for you. The universe is always with you whatever that journey you’re leading on your own!
Much love and gratitude,
I know that sometimes-or perhaps right now-the thought of somewhere on the other side you call “a better place” gives you the sole comfort, as though running away is always the answer. You look at the yonder horizon and wish for someplace else where no one knows you and everyone has sweeter words that are always music to your ears, where things hurt less and everything won’t be out of hand and against you,where you can stroll around or even run blithely without having to feel like you are a scene unwanted,where people have eyes to see your soul and not to look at how incorrigible the flaws you wear,and most of all where breathing and following your heart will be equally easy. Sure, there is a dream of an idyllic life, we always ask for the better, you hate it here because you don’t belong here so there must be a right place where you should be. You feel like a captive now in your own present life because you are still here and freedom seems to be so far away- these are all because you just want to escape.Do not cheat on your fate. Do you know why you are here?
Because everything is already here, you are here because you belong here. Where you are is where you belong and where you are called to serve the world, even the aged tree knows it stays where it was planted because for decades it remains as the nearest tree where people run to whenever it rains.
It’s the process of life not only for yourself but for others as well.
Wanting to be away from here to be “there” is the torture, you are half present and half absent. No one can walk properly with feet apart.